Helpful hints for parents on the basic teachings
of the Suzuki principles
If you really want to understand the Suzuki Method then you’ll want to read some of the wonderful books that
are out there regarding this method and its approach to learning successfully and how to create desire to learn.
“Nurtured By Love”
by Dr. Suzuki
This book is a bio of Dr. Suzuki’s
life and how he came up with his approach to teaching music called the “Mother Tongue” approach. It will provide
you with great understanding of this method.
“Helping Parents Practice”
Ideas
for Making it Easier by Edmund Sprunger
This book has been so helpful to me and I know it will be for you. It’s written by a Suzuki teacher
with many years of experience.
“How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk” By Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish
This book is
great for parents to learn to listen to their child so they can really be able to be there for them.
The
Purpose of Suzuki training is to help every child find the joy that comes through the making of music. Through the mother-tongue
approach, children develop confidence, self-esteem, self-discipline, concentration, and the determination to try difficult
things.
Parent and child
bond together in a unique and rewarding manner through their experience of sharing and mutual learning.
The Teacher’s Job
- The teacher must teach the mother (parent, guardian) to be a good at home teacher. “Six days of poor,
misguided practice at home can cancel out the best teaching in the private lessons, “says Dr. Suzuki .
- The teacher will
give “Pre-Practices” and they must be followed to the letter. If the parent doesn’t understand what their
child is asked to practice then the teacher will work with the parent and child until they both understand the lesson. If
this is not done correctly then the child will not be successful during at home practices.
- The teacher will instruct the parent
on proper at home practices.
- Instructing parents on how to have a pleasant at home practice. The teacher will give suggestions and
tell you what books have helped other parents in their success.
The Mother’s Job
The mother must actively participate
in their child’s learning. If you want your child’s lesson to be effective then, please don’t take any phone
calls, business or otherwise, while your child is having their lesson. This is counter productive to your child’s learning.
Please keep in mind that the child needs only one teacher at the lesson. Please refrain from talking
to your child during the lesson.
EXAMPLE:
You may find that the teacher is quietly waiting for your child to listen to the teacher. The
teacher will wait for your child to respond and sit quietly until the child realizes that the teacher is no longer talking
and the child will return their attention back to the teacher. Some parents want to speak to the child, in an effort of being
a good parent, to tell the child the teacher is talking to them. Please don’t do that, because the waiting is how the
teacher will regain your child’s attention in a loving way. They always come around. If the parent should react it may
create a negative response and we only want to come from a loving place when speaking to children. This is teaching your child
how to pay attention in a loving way. Two people telling them what to do may become overwhelming for the child.
All parents need to take notes at the lesson in order to have “quality at home practices.” You
are the teacher at home. The teacher will help make this clear at the lesson to your child. Please save any questions until
the end of the lesson as much as possible. Please sit with your child and study along with them. Please make sure that there
are no distractions present before you start practicing with your child. You can not make dinner, talk on the phone, or do
anything other than sit and make sure your child practices 100% correctly to the best of your ability. There will come a time
that your child no longer needs your help.
The parent must find ways to make practices at
home fun and enjoyable. It’s the parents duty to joyfully get the child to practice. Children need adults to make decisions
for them when they are young. They need your gentle coaxing. I was reminding one of my parents at a lesson not to forget that
their child needed gentle coaxing and the child replied, “I love gentle coaxing.” It was so cute we had to laugh.
If you’re upset because your child is not doing a good job practicing at home then you
may be creating an unpleasant environment for your child. The parent must always come from a joyful place in their heart.
If you’re frustrated, then you’re child will become frustrated. Arguing with your child about the lesson is futile
and you’re better off not practicing. Learn how to inspire your child. If you’re child doesn’t eat his/her
vegetables then how do you handle that? Ask yourself what do I use to get my child to do other things that are important.
How am I successful and use that to practice at home with your child. Use “gentle coaxing.” Gentle coaxing is
used by saying to the child: “You know I love it when you play the violin (piano, guitar, etc.) You always do a good
job.” Please don’t lie, but you know you can always find something good in everything your child does. If you
do this, your child will respond in a positive way.
.
HOME PRACTICES
The conflict between parent and child during a practice is a good
indicator as to whether your child is really practicing well or not. If the child doesn’t understand what to do then
the child will get frustrated. The parent needs to make it seem easy and fun The parent needs to decide whether real work
is getting done or that some changes to practicing need to be made. Frustration from your child doesn’t
mean that you’re a bad parent, but that you may need a newer approach in order to make your child’s practices
more positive. This will help so that your child doesn’t end up overwhelmed with conflict. Too much conflict can ruin
any good attempts at practicing.
Some Suggestions for Positive Practice - You can use the reward system. However,
beware that your child might say I don’t want a lollypop (or whatever your choose). It can become negative so use is
sparingly. On the other hand, some children are highly motivated by the reward system. Of course there are those children
who are on to you and they may feel tricked and nothing not even the best reward will do.
- This suggestion is for the very young
child. When your child doesn’t want to practice then you can say to your child “that’s ok you don’t
have to practice if you don’t want to.” The reason: You want your child to feel they are really doing something
they really want to do and no one is making them. When your child doesn’t want to practice you say to them “that’s
ok I love the violin and I’m going to practice.” Go to the instrument and practice it with a smile on your face,
make happy statements about how much you love playing the violin and you will see your child come running to you. They will
say, “that’s my instrument I want to play.”
